Thursday 30th August 2 p.m.:

Me, Tracey, Gary, Jacky & little Matty Lineham, Tom & Gwen, Malcolm, Chris (Top Banana) Biggs, Tom (used to be the Viking) Friar & Tank met up at the Blue Star garage, Dartford for our annual trip over to the Isle Of Wight for their British Classic Rally - only this year we were going a day early. All loaded and fuelled up, we set off to catch the ferry onto the island, only stopping en route at the Devil's Punchbowl cafe for a quick cup of coffee. Arriving at Portsmouth docks at approximately 4 p.m., we purchased our return tickets (only £19 for 2 persons including bike) and proceeded to board the ferry. 45 minutes later we were on the island.
Now you might wonder why we were going a day early, but certain members of the club enjoyed it so much last year they had decided to book into a nice little hotel in Ventnor which had made us feel so welcome the 2 years before. On arriving at the hotel the bikes were unloaded and we were shown to our rooms where we quickly changed then went down to the bar, thinking we would be the first. No chance - Tom, Chris and Tom & Gwen were already there and we had only been there ten minutes.
After about an hour it was time for dinner. We decided to eat at the hotel and that turned out to be the right choice; the food was excellent and the beer and wine kept coming. By around one in the morning some of us were feeling the effects of too much food and drink and decided to call it a night. Tom, Malcolm and Chris stayed downstairs in the bar talking to Mike and Dawn, the hotel owners until about 3 a.m.!

Friday 31st August:

Breakfast was served in the hotel restaurant and what a breakfast it was: everything from a selection of cereals to the full monty English fry-up with fresh orange juice and as much tea and coffee as you could drink. Fully fed and watered we settled up our bills and loaded up the bikes ready for the off.
Before we left I had a chat with the owners and thanked them for all the hospitality they had shown us and asked if they would have us back next year? They said they would love to have us back and we could also bring some more friends with us. So if you're interested in coming with us next year, see me at the club in the new year and I'll start to get the ball rolling. The price per person was £22.50 for bed & breakfast and around £20 each for a three course meal. A discount will be given if a certain amount of people come along - the more that come, the cheaper it gets.
We arrived at the rally site at the speedway track in Ryde not knowing where to set up tent. Tom Friar made a quick 'phone call to Steve Duff the rally organiser, to find out where to go and we were told to set up camp in the middle of the track. Tents up and gear stowed we felt a few spots of rain so we made our way over to the club house, only just making it before the heavens opened up.
Malcom's tent decided to do a good impression of an indoor paddling pool, so when the rain stopped Tom, Malc and Chris had a little ride down to the local Millets where Malcom duly handed over some English pound notes and came away with a nice new waterproof tent. On their return the tent was erected with speed and efficiency and Malcom moved in. Strangely it didn't rain again all weekend.
Now drinking in the afternoon has never really been my forte but I thought I would give it a try, purely for research purposes. First up was a locally brewed, cheeky little number called Wight Spirit... well it lived up to its name all right - it tasted like the stuff that you use to wash out your paint brushes. So it was on to the Newcastle Brown Ale at £5 for 3 bottles. It didn't take long to start feeling a little bit pissed. This is when the sillies started: Blowing up black bin bags and tying them off ready to put into Ian and Julie's tent for when they arrived later that night.
Now you may be thinking: How could we to do that when they have their tent with them? Wrong - Lee and Andy Adie were bringing the tent with them and they should be arriving at about 5 p.m. Gary and Jacky had volunteered to put it up for them so it wasn't a problem popping the black bags inside. Everything was going well, lots of inflated black bags ready to be put into the tent when it arrives. After a few more drinks the girls decided to vacate the bar and wander back over to the tents to talk about girly things, this left us boys to have a few more drinks and basically talk bollocks.
At around 5 p.m. all the rest of the Bexley crew arrived and duly booked in. We then left the bar to welcome them and to show them where we were camped. As I walked across the track towards our camp I realised that there was something wrong with my legs; they didn't work properly. "Whoops, did it wrong again, Dad" - I'd peaked too early.
Wandering around the camping area I noticed that Tracey and Jacky were putting up a tent and when I asked whose it was "Ian and Julie's" came the reply. Where's Gary I asked? Asleep came the reply; Gary had decided to have a little nap while everyone was putting up their tents, forgetting that he should have been helping Jacky with Ian's tent. Anyway I tried to help the girls put the tent up but just kept getting in the way so I buggered off to find something else to do.
Later that evening we all made our way over to the club house for some dinner although the menu wasn't very good and we had to wait a long time for the grub. I had the lasagne and it was bloody disgusting so it was back to the drinking whilst we waited for the band to come on. The band were called the Maxwell Brothers and they were booked for both the Friday and Saturday nights. At about 10 o'clock they started playing and one of the first on the dance floor was our very own Richard "Tank" Turner closely followed by loads of others.
They played long and hard all night and everybody seemed to enjoy themselves until the small hours. Tracey and I decided to retire to our tent before the band finished but on arriving at the tent and opening the zips we were greeted by loads of blown-up black bin bags stuffed inside our sleeping bags. Removing the bags from our tent we decided to put them into Tom Friar's tent so he and Chris Biggs could have a play with them when they came back from the bar. At about 4 a.m. I woke up in need of the toilet (the lasagne was making another appearance) and on opening the main zip of our tent we were greeted again by the black bin bags. This time we left them where they were and went back to sleep.

Saturday 1st September:

It was up with the lark, ready for our day that had been planned out with military precision. First port of call was Osborne House and for those of you who don't know anything about the place it was the holiday home of Queen Victoria. Andy Adie had been there a few times before and took it upon himself to give us a guided tour, with questions being asked afterwards; not my cup of tea so I whizzed around it and then went for a walk in the gardens which were very nice with lovely views across Cowes harbour. Once everyone had finished the tour we had a quick cup of tea in the restaurant where Andy asked questions about the house. Surprisingly most questions were answered correctly.
Next stop was the Wight Mouse Inn now known as the Clarendon Hotel. The ride from Cowes to the pub took us through Newport, down to Yarmouth, on to Freshwater Bay then down the Military coast road to Black Gang Chine. Now if you haven't ridden this road before you've missed a great treat; it's very picturesque, very fast and twisty and also quite scary and unforgiving. We arrived for lunch at about 2:30 p.m. and spent a good few hours eating and drinking and even some people, i.e. my wife Tracey and Tom Friar, playing on the swings and slides.
All fed and watered it was off back to the camp site to get washed and changed ready for the evening's entertainment. Towel and wash-bag in hand it was off to the showers to be greeted by the coldest water I have felt in a long time. Thinking it might warm up I let it run for about 5 minutes only to find it got even colder, so it was the quickest shower I've ever had and it was no better in the women's either.
Now the evenings entertainment in the club house was the same band as the night before but that didn't bother some of us - we booked a mini-bus to pick us up from the camp site and take us into Ryde to see the carnival. The bus arrived late but 16 of us got on board and were dropped off at the top of the High Street. After a short walk down to the pub the carnival started to pass by. Some of the floats were very well done but my favourite was a samba band which stopped right by us and gave us a sample of this great music that you just can't stand still to. Right at the back of the parade were some entrants from the Notting Hill carnival and they were absolutely fantastic.
With the parade over it was off to meet the mini-bus from where he took us back to the camp site. The cost was £2 each - now that's cheap! On entering the club house the rest of Bexley had gathered and were giving it large on the dance floor. Now you may remember that I said it was the same band for both nights and we were hoping that they would have a different set for Saturday; no chance - it was exactly the same as the previous night.
At about 10:30 p.m. the band stopped playing so the presentations and the raffle could take place. Yet again Bexley Triumph got the best club turnout and Jacky Lineham riding her trusty buckaroo got furthest travelled female. After a few more drinks and a bit of dancing it was time to retire to bed as it had been a long and busy day and I was ready to hit the sack.

Sunday 2nd September:

The morning arrived and Tracey and I awoke to find that not only had all the zips been cable-tied up but the winners rostrum from the speedway track was right outside the door. The jokers had struck again. With the tents all packed away and stowed on the bikes some of us decided to go to the local ASDA for breakfast before catching the ferry back home. With a full belly it was off to the ferry port where in arriving Gary Lineham realised that he had lost his ferry ticket. Panicking a little he went to the office where they duly printed out a duplicate. By this time everyone else had turned up and we only had to wait a short time for the next boat.
With a quick stop at the Devil's Punch Bowl for a cup of tea it was off home for a nice warm shower and to reflect on what had been a brilliant weekend. If you haven't been to the Isle of Wight Rally before you've missed a great time and I highly recommend it. You won't be disappointed.